The Buddhist Hour Radio Broadcast Archives
The
Buddhist Hour Radio Broadcast Script 263
Sunday 9 February
2003
Glossary:
munificence: splendidly generous, bountiful.
Today's
Script is entitled:
“The Blessing of Caga –
Emotional Maturity”
There
are four blessings that a human being can enjoy.
The blessing
of caga or emotional maturity is the end result of cultivating and
attaining the four blessings.
They are: to be debtless, to
enjoy material objects, to enjoy the blessings of your own material
objects, and to have caga or emotional maturity.
The four
blessings are attained only in this order, as each one is a gateway
to the next.
The development of caga (pronounced “charga”)
differs from metta (or loving-kindness) in that caga is passive
whilst metta is active. When developed, caga becomes an attribute of
the meditator, whereas metta requires a sender and receiver.
If
persons meet with caga, they will meet again in a future life.
The
forming of relationships built on caga or emotional maturity are rare
to find.
The French writer Simone De Beauvoir wrote in the
novel ‘La Force de l’Age, ‘Harmony between two
individuals is never granted - it has to be conquered
indefinitely.’
and
In the 1997 screenplay ‘Annie
Hall’ , writer and actor Woody Allen commented that, ‘a
relationship I think is...is like a shark. You know it has to
constantly move forward or it dies.’
On marriage Michele
De Montaigne wrote in Essay 111 in 1588, ‘a good marriage (if
there be any) refuseth the company and conditions of love; it
endeavorath to present those of amity. it is a sweet society of life,
full of consistency, of trust, and an infinite number of profitable
and solid offices, and mutual obligations.’
In a similar
vein Samuel Johnson noted in Boswell’s Life 1772, ‘It is so
far from being natural for a man and a women to live in a state of
marriage that we find all the motives which they have for remaining
in that connection, and the restraints which civilised society
imposes to prevent separation, are hardly sufficient to keep them
together.’
Another view comes from Joseph Addison in The
Spectator 1711 who wrote: ‘Those marriages generally abound most
with love and constancy that are preceded by a long courtship’.
In
1785 Robert Burns wrote in Epistle to J. Lapraik, ‘I want
someone to laugh with me, someone to be grave with me, someone to
please me and help my discrimination with his or her own remark, and
at times, no doubt, to admire my acuteness and penetration.’
Our
Teacher has explained that our Centre has many assets or resources,
but the greatest resource is the Members.
The Members
contribute their time, skills, energy and personal resources for the
benefit of our Centre the Chan Academy Australia and many other
beings. When these contributions are made with mindfulness and caga
the practitioner and others benefit greatly.
For Caga
(emotional maturity) and love to flourish and endure within a true
relationship three important conditions are required.
These
are: appreciation, empathy and forgiveness.
Firstly:
Appreciation
Each partner should appreciate the fortunate
conditions of being able to meet and to love together in this
lifetime.
All relationships are based on the accumulation of
kamma which is the result of one's actions through many past lives.
Broadly speaking, among all the possible kinds of
relationships, the partnership of husband and wife occurs through the
gathering of much more deeper kamma than any other type of
relationships. It is the result of many virtuous deeds and actions in
the past. In a marriage there is the opportunity to produce and amass
the many good causes which result in great happiness.
Empathy
is knowing and understanding another person's needs, wants and
desires. The two opposites of male and female are just like the
positive and negative forces of electricity. They must be like this
so that they can help each other. Let each have their different views
and opinions and needs - but with empathy they can still come
together and harmonise every kind of contradiction.
Forgiveness
is the third important condition. It enables any discord that arises
to give way immediately to the relish of concord. The relationship of
marriage is normally based on love not reason. Hence, our manner to
each other should be to forgive and not to judge. Through forgiveness
what is broken is made whole again and what is muddied is made clear
again.
Through the conditions of appreciation, empathy and
forgiveness, one's marriage will endure a long time.
The
Buddha taught (in "The 'Good Born' Young Man Sutra") his
lay people how to maintain right love in three right ways. This is
applicable to marriage.
The first right way is that each
should have respect for the other;
The second right way is
that each should be sustained by the other physically, emotionally
and mentally;
The third right way is that each should be
comforted with wisdom and understanding.
In China, there is a
common saying that husband and wife should always be respectful to
each other, as if each were welcoming a newly come noble guest.
When we love together, there is love and when we quarrel
there is also love, enduring love.
By this way our love can
be kept a long time.
The Pali language word caga is
translated into the English words abandoning, giving up,
renunciation, and more frequently, as liberality, generosity,
munificence.
Caga in the latter sense forms one of the four
treasures or blessings a human can have.
Caga is also the 5th
of the 6 recollections that the Buddha recommended should be
developed and pursued, the other 5 being recollection of the Buddha,
the Dhamma, the Sangha, morality, liberality and Devas.
In the
Mahanama Sutta (1) (Anguttara Nikaya XI.13) the Buddha taught
Mahanama the householder:
Furthermore, there is the case where
you recollect your own generosity: 'It is a gain, a great gain for
me, that -- among people overcome with the stain of possessiveness --
I live at home, my awareness cleansed of the stain of possessiveness,
freely generous, open-handed, delighting in being magnanimous,
responsive to requests, delighting in the distribution of alms.'
Of
one who does this, Mahanama, it is said: 'Among those who are out of
tune, the disciple of the noble ones dwells in tune; among those who
are malicious, he dwells without malice; having attained the stream
of Dhamma, he develops the recollection of generosity.'
The
Buddha further recommended to Mahanama:
"Mahanama, you
should develop this recollection of generosity while you are walking,
while you are standing, while you are sitting, while you are lying
down, while you are busy at work, while you are resting in your home
crowded with children.”
Caga is also one of the 7
treasures, of which the Buddha taught in the Anguttara Nikaya VII.6
the Dhana (Treasure) Sutta:
These, monks, are the seven
treasures.
the treasure of conviction,
the treasure of
virtue,
the treasure of conscience and concern,
the treasure of
listening, generosity,
and discernment as the seventh
treasure.
Whoever, man or woman, has these treasures
is said
not to be poor, has not lived in vain.
So conviction and virtue,
confidence and Dhamma-vision
should be cultivated by the
wise,
remembering the Buddha's' instruction.
Caga is an
attitude, a disposition, and a quality.
Bhikkhu Bodhi (1990)
wrote in 'Dana: The Practice of Giving' that “giving can…be
identified with the personal quality of generosity (caga).
This…highlights the practice of giving, not as the…act by
which an object is transferred from oneself to others, but as the
inward disposition to give, a disposition which is strengthened
by…acts of giving and which in turn makes possible still more
demanding acts of self-sacrifice. Generosity is included among the
essential attributes of the sappurisa, the good or superior person,
along with such other qualities as faith, morality, learning and
wisdom. Viewed as the quality of generosity, giving has a
particularly intimate connection to the entire movement of the
Buddha's path. For the goal of the path is the destruction of greed,
hate and delusion, and the cultivation of generosity directly
debilitates greed and hate, while facilitating that pliancy of mind
that allows for the eradication of delusion.”
When you
give outwardly with the right view, you do so with the inner attitude
of giving, of generosity.
Lily De Silva (1990) wrote in 'Dana:
Giving In the Pali Canon' that “Dana is the very practical act
of giving, caga is the generous attitude ingrained in the mind by the
repeated practice of dana. The word caga literally means giving up,
abandonment, and it is an indication that the close-fitted selfish
grip one has on one's possessions is loosened by caga. It is possible
to give alms even out of negative motives such as favouritism
(chanda), ill will (dosa), fear (bhaya), delusion (moha), desire for
a good reputation, etc., but caga is the positive virtue of a
generous disposition.”
When a person practices generosity
of giving with the right view they strengthen the inclination toward
generosity, which in turn makes possible even greater generosity.
This is the path leading to attainment of caga.
So we can say
that the true practice of generosity, or dana in pali, is only
possible if the mind has caga: letting go, renunciation, not
'expecting anything back in return'. If you have a mind with caga you
are not greedy for the result or for benefits to oneself as a
result.
In our Buddhist Hour Broadcast 260 titled “The
blessing of being debtless” we learnt that a non-debtless mind
cannot accept kindness, emotional support, sweet words or materiality
because it is suspicious and disturbed by the offer because it is
emotionally immature. A main cause of this is greed, in Pali, lobha.
The antidote to a mind with debt is to practice
generosity.
There is no stinginess or greed in a mind that
freely gives or that recollects the joy of giving.
If you are
debtless, you can accept offers of materiality and emotional warmth
from others with goodwill.
Sometimes, emotional warmth is felt
to be more important than physical wealth to wealthy people.
The
test of extraordinary wealth or merit is to see those who enjoy it
the most are praised by others.
People with less merit are not
praised by others.
Some can offer emotional warmth to many
persons and not appear to run out of supplies to give it.
As
Proverbs VIII, 15. circa 200 B.C say: “A merry heart doeth good
like a medicine”.
Yet some persons do not appear capable
of responding to human warmth. They act as though they are
emotionally dead.
Some people of low merit cannot respond to
emotional warmth. Emotional warmth is one of the four nutrients
needed by human beings.
In earlier times, the meaning of
wealth meant well-being (weal). Members at our Centre freely
contribute their time, skills, energy and personal resources for the
benefit of the Centre and other beings. They learn to make
contributions with mindfulness and caga. By practicing to have a
debtless mind, the practitioner and others benefit greatly.
The
policy of our Chan Academy Australia is to remain debtless by not
borrowing money.
Next Friday the 14th of February is
St.Valentine's Day, a day which evokes rich imagery of love and lush
red roses, where throughout the world people buy and offer flowers
and gifts.
Many persons want to improve their relationships.
What you are learning in today's radio program can help you achieve
this.
How can we develop 'love' towards other beings.
It
is often thought that 'love' with another person can be developed by
giving them something, for example, money, the use of our car,
flowers, a film ticket, or a paid holiday.
More in accord
with Buddha Dhamma is the recognition that our generosity (dana) must
be practiced with caga, clear intention and awareness of our friend's
real needs.
The Lord Buddha taught the Metta Sutta method of
the practice of loving-kindness.
When metta practice is well
developed, it should be given to all beings, just as an upturned
water jar gives water in all directions without bias.
True
esteem and affection arises from the provision of things that
genuinely bless the receiver.
Thoughtless giving between
people creates relationships based upon notions of obligation that
leads either one, or both persons to accuse the other of a lack of
affection with such words, as "You should be more grateful,
after all I've done for you".
Whatever emotional
security we can gain from others by giving them presents with an
implicit demand that they love us, is based upon our own refusal to
be loved at the present time.
Is it possible to offer
something to another person with love if our gift is tagged with some
kind of obligation and not with loving intention? Without loving
intention, the answer is no. With loving intention, the answer is
maybe.
Reciprocity of affection is closer in meaning to the
'love' of Buddha Dhamma.
Principles of relations between
persons may be extended to include the development of benevolence to
other persons.
Buddha Dhamma shows this is possible because
sane human beings have similar needs.
However, the
development of 'compassion' without wisdom is not sufficient to
obtain insight into 'what is what', that is, into the conditions of
existence. It should be almost unnecessary to add that the reverse is
also true.
Compassion without wisdom is ultimately untenable.
The Macquarie Dictionary defines 'untenable' as being incapable of
being held against attack.
For caga and love to flourish and
endure within a relationship, three important conditions are
required.
These are appreciation, empathy and forgiveness.
Each partner should appreciate the fortunate conditions of
being able to meet and to love together in this lifetime.
All
relationships are based on the accumulation of kamma that is the
result of one's actions through many past lives. Broadly speaking,
among all the possible kinds of relationships, the partnership of
husband and wife occurs through the gathering of much more deeper
kamma than any other type of relationships. It is the result of many
virtuous deeds and actions in the past. In a marriage there is the
opportunity to produce and amass the many good causes which result in
great happiness.
The Buddha taught his lay people (in "The
'Good Born' Young Man Sutra") how to maintain right love in
three right ways. This is applicable to marriage.
The first
right way is that each should have respect for the other.
The
second right way is that each should be sustained by the other
physically, emotionally and mentally; and
The third right way
is that each should be comforted with wisdom and understanding.
In
China, there is a common saying that husband and wife should always
be respectful to each other, as if each were welcoming a newly come
noble guest.
The Sigalovada Sutta, which is a code of
discipline given by the Buddha for lay Buddhists, gives clear
guidance to lay people in the areas of domestic and social life. The
purpose of this code of discipline is to provide the basis of proper
conduct, self-control and guidelines for laypersons to lead a happy,
peaceful and worthwhile household life.
The Sutta explains
such things as the channels of dissipation of wealth, the four kinds
of enemies who masquerade as friends, the four kinds of real friends
and the proper responsibilities to the various kinds of relationships
in the householder's life.
In the relationship of husband and
wife, there are five ways described by which the wife shows her
compassion and kindness to her husband and five ways described by
which the husband shows his compassion and kindness to his
wife.
Regarding the proper conduct for a husband and wife the
Buddha stated that:
“In five ways, should a wife as the
West be ministered by her husband:
1. by courtesy
2. by not
despising her
3. by faithfulness
4. by handing over authority
to her
5. by providing her with ornaments
The wife who is
thus ministered to by her husband as the West shows her compassion to
her husband in five ways:
1. she performs her duties in
perfect order
2. she is hospitable
3. she is not unfaithful
4.
she protects what he brings
5. she is industrious and not lazy in
discharging her duties
In these five ways does the wife show
her compassion to her husband who ministers to her as the West. Thus
is the West covered and made secure and safe.”
If two
lovers exchange flowers on St. Valentine's Day (or any other day for
that matter) with the thought of transformation of merit to caga, it
would be possible for those two lovers to meet again in a future
life. The potential for this positive action using the merit of
flowers is why we choose to sell flowers on this day.
The
Buddha taught that due to cause and effect there are ten blessings
arising from the offering of flowers. These are:
1. Long
Life
2. Good Health
3. Strength
4. Beauty
5. Wisdom
6.
Ease along the Buddha Dhamma Path
7. Being born in beautiful
environments
8. Born with good skin, hair and beautiful to look
at
9. Always having a sweet smelling body
10. Pleasant
relationships with friends
If human beings understood that the
offering of flowers leads to the above ten blessings, flower stalls
around the world would be sold out before 7.00am not only on St.
Valentine's Day but everyday of the year.
Generosity (or dana,
in Pali) is the first perfection in Buddha Dhamma practice.
In
the development of a true relationship, the Buddha advised the
practice of caga (pronounced charga) or emotional maturity.
The
development of caga, which translates as "emotional maturity",
differs from metta (or loving-kindness) in that caga is passive while
metta is active. Caga, when developed, becomes another attribute of
the meditator, whereas metta requires a sender and receiver.
If
persons meet with caga, they will meet again in a future life.
For
many centuries, Dhamma Practitioners have understood the virtue in
offering flowers to the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha, family and
friends.
The Buddha Dhamma theory of causation, as explained
by Daisaku Ikeda in the publication, Buddhism: The Living Philosophy,
describes the present self as an accumulation of actions from the
past. All past causes contribute to the present effect.
In a
lecture given by the Venerable Sayadaw U Sobhana in 1972, on the
'Theory of Kamma in Buddhism', and reproduced in a publication
titled, An Introduction to Buddha Dhamma', the Pali language word
'kamma' literally means action or doing.
The Venerable Sayadaw
U Sobhana stated that any kind of intentional action whether mental,
verbal or physical is regarded as kamma. It covers all that is
included in the thought, word and deed. Generally speaking, all good
and bad actions constitute kamma. In its ultimate sense, kamma means
all moral and immoral volition. Involuntary, unintentional, or
unconscious action, though technically deeds do not constitute kamma,
because volition, the most important factor in the determining of
kamma, is absent.
The Buddha says: “I declare o Bikkhus,
that volition is kamma. Having willed one acts by body, speech, and
thought”. (Anguttara Nikaya)
Each year St. Valentine's
Day, brings to life notions and ideals of romance and love between
men and women. Valentines Day reminds us of the celebration of love.
In the modern Italian culture, the term “Voler Bene”,
which is derived from early Roman times, is used and means 'a giving
of love and caring'. Love and a successful relationship bring much
happiness and mutual blessings.
But love and the development
of a relationship perhaps require more than just the mere offering of
red roses once a year.
We commend the offering of flowers as a
cause leading to affection.
Buy flowers for your loved one
this St.Valentine's Day from our stalls in Wantirna and Lilydale.
They are located on Swansea Road Lilydale and at 436 Stud
Road, Wantirna, in front of Il Castello Pasta restaurant.
We
look forward to seeing you this Friday 14th February so that you too
can make causes for affection this Valentine's Day.
May you
develop caga in your relationships this very life for caga has its
basis in wisdom.
May you be well and happy.
The authors
and editors of this script are Julian Bamford BA(AppRec), Jason
Glasson BA(Hons), Amber Svensson and Pennie White BA
DipEd.
References
Bhikkhu Bodhi (Ed), 1990, “Dana:
The Practice of Giving”, The Wheel Publication No. 367/369, ISBN
955-24-0077-5, Buddhist Publication Society.
Mencken, 1991,
H.L. A New Dictionary of Quotations, Published by Alfred A. Knopf,
Inc. New York.
Compiled by Jonathon Green, 1982, A Dictionary
of Contemporary Quotations, David & Charles Publishers, Great
Britain.
Lily De Silva, Dana: “Giving In the Pali
Canon”, essay 2 of Dana: The Practice of Giving The Wheel
Publication No. 367/369, ISBN 955-24-0077-5, Buddhist Publication
Society.
Hughes, John D., Halls, Evelin and White, Pennie
(2001) 'How do we develop true relationships?' The Buddhist Hour
Radio Broadcast, Sunday 11 February 2001, Buddhist Discussion Centre
(Upwey) Ltd., Melbourne.
Bamford, J., Halls, E., Pargeter, R.,
Svensson, A. & White P. (2002) "The blessing of being
debtless", Buddhist Hour Broadcast 260, 19 January 2003,
Buddhist Discussion Centre (Upwey) Ltd., Melbourne.
Bamford,
J., Halls, E., Svensson, A. & White P. (2002) "The blessing
of being debtless", Buddhist Hour Broadcast 262, 2 February
2003, Buddhist Discussion Centre (Upwey) Ltd.,
Melbourne.
Readability Statistics
Counts
Words:
3500
Characters: 17534
Paragraphs: 155
Sentences:
164
Averages
Sentences per paragraph: 1.4
Words per
Sentence: 19.6
Characters per word: 4.8
Readability
Statistics
Passive Sentences: 10
Flesch Reading Ease score:
48.1
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level score: 11.3
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